Thursday, July 11, 2013

Goings On

The other night I couldn't fall asleep because I was obsessing about babies and blogging. I probably should update this more often than I do because something very exciting is happening in our family right now and I want to give all the updates!

Well, the updates are actually not that exciting. I'm getting rounder, seen by the photos at the end of this post (sorry, my cropping skills in GIMP are sub par and the sizes are all off). I'm also suffering from some occasional round ligament pain and an insatiable appetite. I have had a craving, actually, and that is for really plain cheeseburgers from McDonald's. I just want simple flat patty, cheese, pickles, ketchup and mustard. To McDonalds' delight and my wallet's chagrin, they happen to offer a two cheeseburger meal, which has become my standard. I find myself planning my grocery shopping around lunch time because there is a McDonald's next door. Anyway, I also have had just one food aversion. Depending on how it's prepared, my stomach turns at the smell of chicken. If it's smothered and marinated in a sauce or battered really well then that can help take away that chicken-y smell.

In other pregnancy news, we find out baby's gender on July 23rd (just under two weeks!). We are so excited and impatient! We would be happy with either a boy or a girl. Sometimes I feel like it's going to be a boy but then recently I've been feeling more like a girl... it flip flops, so really no one can fault me for predicting incorrectly! We've had names tentatively picked out for a long, long time. I feel a little weird just blurting them out on the internet even though I unashamedly tell people in person so if you're curious you're welcome to text/email/Facebook message me about it. I also really like these names (the girl one we have had picked out since before we were officially engaged!) and I don't want them to be stolen... I don't mind telling you that the girl's middle name will likely be Luvera (my maternal grandma) and the boy's will be Wallace (Bryan's middle name after his great-grandfather).

So, we're pretty much ecstatic and I'm impatiently waiting pretty much everything: first movement, baby's gender, being kicked and elbowed and knowing there really is a little baby in there! Most of all, meeting my baby in December (possibly November if baby decides to come at 37-38 weeks, still full-term). I guess I just can't stop talking about babies because I've thought about them my whole life but in particular for the last 15 months + 18ish weeks. When I was little and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up I always said, "a mom," so it's safe to say that this has basically been my lifelong dream. Because of that, Bryan and I knew when we got married that we only wanted to wait a year into marriage at most to start trying. We made it about 6 months-- January 2012. I alluded to the fact that it took us a while to get pregnant in my last post. Now, I'm really not trying to get heavy with this topic here but I had a desire to share about it recently. I've talked to people who tried or have been trying for many years and so I'm grateful that it wasn't longer but, even still, those 15 months were some of the hardest I've gone through. A doctor won't even see you until you've been trying for a year, even when you know something isn't quite right before that. When we finally reached our year mark we had some tests done that delayed things even more but, lo and behold, there were some issues. I won't get into specifics (unless you're a girl and you want to text/email/Facebook message me personally) but finally I started on clomid. It was actually a little miracle that I was able to start when I did and I fully and completely attribute it to my Heavenly Father. After just one round of clomid, I was pregnant! It was surreal, to say the least. Months and months and months of negative pregnancy tests and tears and wondering why I was being denied this thing I wanted more than anything else and then... yes. It is a testament to the fact that things happen on the Lord's timetable. He helped me get on the medicine He knew my body needed at the time He wanted it and then helped it to come about quickly. Some unbelievers may ask, why didn't He just make your body able to have kids without medicine? You know, I don't know all the way but I believe this was a trial that was necessary for me and that even though those months were hard, He was there beside me the whole time, comforting me. He knows and feels our pains in our trials but He knows that we cannot become the people that we need to be without taking a few journeys in this life. Anyway, I was still a wreck worrying over miscarriage for weeks and weeks. I still do worry, sometimes. I just have to keep trusting that everything happens as it is meant to. Okay, that did turn out a little heavy in the end but I would be remiss and unappreciative not to acknowledge this truth.

On one last note regarding that subject-- I hope if you haven't encountered such problems that you will be kind to those who you know have and are encountering them. If someone trusts you enough to tell you they're having a hard time, as well meaning as you are trying to be, please do not say some of the following:
  1. Oh, you just need to relax. I know someone who tried for years and then got pregnant when they stopped trying! (This is the classic response and not really accurate if there is something medically wrong).
  2. You do know that it sometimes takes a few months, right? (Now you're just making me feel dumb. Plus, how do you know how long I've been trying?)
  3. All my husband has to do is look at me and I get pregnant! (This one just kind of rubs our noses in it a little.)
  4. Oh, my sister had a hard time too. It took her like five months to get pregnant! (Again, I guess i won't tell you how long I've been trying...)
Okay, okay, that's probably enough. Those are all things people said to me and I love those people still but it's just a little hurtful. Anyway, we're very happy now to be having our baby and have those days behind us. Have I not said enough how happy we are? Life is good. We have a crib and mattress but not much else. We also just bought a new couch-- we've slowly been acquiring things for our beautiful new house. No room is complete yet so pictures are still going to be a bit. I have an inkling that the nursery will be the first room finished :).

We also had a family reunion a couple weeks ago in Utah, which was fun. We had one day with my mom's side of the family and the rest with my dad's. Since Bryan and I live away from most of my family, it was great to see everyone. I have a sister who is moving to Qatar next month so this was kind of our last hurrah for a while. I'm getting really bad at being the Bryan and Alyssa Whitney family photographer and took pretty much zero pictures there. Oh well!

Other than that, summer is progressing and it's much too hot for my taste. I think I've decided I like winter better. Of course, then winter will come and I'll likely change my mind. Fall and Spring are obviously best and Boise actually has these seasons! (Sorry, Utah.) Anyway, I'll try to update again after we find out the gender, but here are the promised pregnancy pics: